ETHICAL BEHAVIOR IN BREATHWORK SESSIONS
©️ Tilke Platteel-Deur
Ethics in Breathwork 2025
Our perspective on ethical behavior in Breathwork highlights the profound depth of the client-therapist connection. It emphasizes not just actions or external conduct, but the foundational inner state and attitude of the practitioner.
Unconditional Support and Universal Love
The notion that clients deserve “our absolute very best” underscores the therapist’s role as a guide who creates a safe, nurturing space. By embodying acceptance, appreciation, and authenticity, therapists can foster trust and openness. Above all, we offer our love, the universal love that adds a spiritual dimension, implying that effective therapy taps into a shared, transcendent connection.
The Unique Intimacy of Breathwork
As Breathwork therapists, our role extends beyond mere conversation; we breathe consciously and in harmony together with our clients. This shared breathing creates a connection that surpasses the intimacy found in other therapeutic practices. It creates a shared energy field that can enhance vulnerability and connection. This intimacy requires therapists to maintain a heightened level of self-awareness, as their energy directly impacts the client.
As energy flows more freely throughout the body, a truly relaxed exhale settles into the pelvic area – the foundation of our physical being, a region most often conditioned for control. Facilitating relaxation and energy flow in this area demands sensitivity, integrity, and expertise, as it can unlock profound personal emotions.
Inner Attitude over Behavior
Ethical behavior is not just about adhering to a set of rules or guidelines but embodying a genuine state of presence and care. It should be rooted more in our inner attitude than in our outward actions. This aligns with the necessity of authenticity in therapeutic practice – being fully present and operating from a place of high integrity. Being truly present entails a sensual connection within oneself that requires more than just mindful awareness.
Because intimacy in Breathwork is very powerful, therapists must remain extreme vigilant about maintaining professional boundaries. This ensures that the therapeutic relationship stays ethical, regardless of the depth of connection.
Since the shared energy dynamic affects the therapist just as much as the client, regular self-care practices, grounding techniques, and supervision can help maintain their well- being and ethical presence.
Boundaries
There is a very fine line between loving attention for a client and trespassing – even in the slightest way – into sexual transgression. The danger of sliding into a sexually tinted atmosphere is sometimes very close.
In breathwork sessions we not only work with the Inner Child, but we also often work with the part that is like a new-born baby. Nobody in his right mind would act sexually with a small child or a baby.
Sexual relations between therapists and their clients are ultimately always harmful, as the given trust is abused. A client comes to us for healing, not for sex or sexual attention.
Moreover, there is always an inequality in the power structure between a therapist and his clients just as there is inequality between e.g. a doctor and his patients. All people who are in the ‘higher’ power position are in danger of trespassing the fine line between healthy authority and sexual transgression.
Loving Attention versus Being in Love
It happens quite often that clients will begin to feel love for their therapist. The process of positive transference may make them feel like ‘being in love’. In their experience of romantic glow, they will think that this “love” is reciprocal, even if the therapist/trainer has consciously never intended to invoke any such feelings.
We must understand that, even if a client behaves as if he is inviting a sexual encounter, the real need on the client’s side is a longing for acceptance, intimacy, and loving attention. The real need is never a need for sex. Sexual relations between therapists and clients always compromise the foundation of trust and healing. Our clients seek our guidance for emotional and psychological support, not for any form of sexual attention.
The therapist’s Need for Intimacy
If we are not conscious about our own need for intimacy, we might fall into the trap of thinking that this romantic offer could be the solution to our own loneliness. If we act on this opportunity for creating intimacy, or even having sex with our client, seeking solace for our needs, we will hurt the client because we would in fact be abusing him, just satisfying our own desires. True consciousness means being aware that hurting others is the same as hurting ourselves.
– Ethical Therapeutic Attitude – Containing the Energy
Therapists need to be completely at ease with their own body, loving, respecting and accepting it.
Just as essential for us, as therapists, is to cultivate a deep sense of comfort with our own sexual energy. It is crucial that we have done intense private work and worked through our own personal life history. We need to intimately know how we have developed our own sexuality. Where do we have hidden desires? What makes us feel lonely? What turns us on? Do we use our sexual energy to make an impression on others?
The emphasis lies on containment.
Containment means carrying whatever energy happens within our client or within ourselves, without acting upon it.
It means maintaining clear boundaries even when we begin to feel personally attracted to a client. In a situation like this, we do not declare our love. We seek professional supervision!
It means maintaining clear boundaries even in the face of clients who may project romantic feelings onto us or attempt to provoke such interactions. Regardless of any declarations of love or attraction, we must remain persistent in our commitment to professional ethics and the well-being of our clients.
If a client feels attracted to us, it is quite natural to feel flattered. We need to be aware, however, that this attraction is directed at us as the therapist and not at us personally. In situations like these we address the situation and examine the underlying issues in the client as well as in ourselves. In some situations, we might have to end the therapeutic sessions and refer our client to another therapist.
It’s just as crucial that we can speak about sexual energy in a normal and shame-free way. So, we can support our clients to get a healthy and intimate relationship with their own body.
Touching
To feel at ease with the body of another, we must first be comfortable with our own. Only then can we touch with assurance, confidence, and respect.
It’s important to understand the purpose and timing of touch. A touch holds meaning only as long as it serves its purpose; beyond that moment, it risks becoming empty or unwelcome.
Touch is both a physical and energetic connection.
When we are in a place of listening and without any agenda and we touch another person, then that person can relax and feel safe.
When we have an agenda, that same touch can feel very different and uncomfortable to the extreme of being abusive.
Above all, touching requires clarity in our own energy – untainted by sensual or sexual undertones, but rooted in genuine intention. We never touch the breasts, buttocks, groin, or perineum of the client. Nor does the facilitator touches themselves there! We feel the energy and do not act upon it!
We must acknowledge that different clients may have different comfort levels with the deep energetic connection that happens in breathwork sessions. Tailoring our approach to individual needs and cultural backgrounds is crucial for an inclusive practice.
Conclusion
Love, acceptance, and appreciation are vital to create a secure space for our clients, where they can freely explore all their feelings. Our role is to provide unwavering support and confidentiality, never allowing our personal desires to interfere with the trust placed in us.
In upholding these principles, we uphold the integrity of the therapeutic process and honour the vulnerability of those who seek our assistance.
This attitude involves a training that surpasses the limitations of a few workshops.
To read: Paul Hitchings – “Welcoming the erotic into therapy”.
